"If you can keep your head while all men doubt you

And all are pissed or busy sniffing glue

If you can trust yourself when all girls tweet you

And make allowance for their twitters too

If you can write and not be tired by writing

If lying in ‘til twelve, don’t lie about it

And fib and say you’ve never stopped

Just study hard, do everything you oughta’

And which is more, you’ll be a social worker, daughter.


Graham Chalk
(apologies to Rudyard Kipling)